Talk Stupid

Emergency Rooms = ZZZZZZZ

// June 15th, 2009 // DVs Observations

So, my sickness was so bad that I had to go to the ER. I’ll spare you the details because it’s nothing big or cool or anything like that. Ends up I have some unknown virus, but apparently there are a lot of viruses that can’t be identified… you have to love modern medicine. In any case, the biggest and shittiest thing about the ER is waiting for test results to get back. That and waiting for a nurse to check on you and give said tests. Yeah, I know, they’re busy… I get it. It still sucks. But, how about some shoutouts to all the nurses that actually love their jobs… and a big kick in the ass for those nurses that obviously don’t… boo!

Anyway, I actually missed the NBA Finals because of this ER visit, which I thought would only be a couple hours, but ended up being almost seven hours thanks to waiting longass hours for the aforementioned reason. It was so bad I actually read my Patients Bill of Rights pamphlet three times. Cover to cover. No joke. Did you know that if you have anal leakage you have a write to ask your physician to stick a sponge up your bum? Crazy.

Of course, I had to do that whole stupid Twitter/Facebook mundane status update thing and tell everyone that was my “friend” or followed me that I was going to the ER. My buddy, Sal from EdgeFM.net actually texted me to make sure I was alright. Aw, what a sweet young fella that Sal is. Then, of course, being Sal, he told me to not forget to ask them to administer an AIDS test on me. Is Sal sweet or what?

After taking all the tests, as well as a chest x-ray, it turns out that everything was negative, including a test for the flu. As I mentioned previously, I thought I might have had swine flu from the pigs at work, but I guess not. I have a virus that cannot be identified and therefore will have to let it work itself out. It’s pretty much the equivalent of when you played Little League and got hit by the ball and your coach told you to “walk it off.”

Gee, thanks.